Dear Mr. Myer,
I have been injected with a dose of "heart-on-my-sleeve" potion and needed to get this out of my head before I reverted back to my guarded, got-it-all-under-control style. So this is an open letter about romance to the next future Mr. Myer.
A movie I just watched said "when your heart has been broken or mangled it grows back even bigger". That must be what I feel. This pain in my chest is my heart growing bigger.
I have never had a great Valentines day. N.E.V.E.R. It's amazing when I think back over the years of all the attempts that were made and ended up half-assed. For example; receiving roses on the 16th, or the 17th. Going on "double dates" with my guys best friend and his loser, winey girlfriend is not my idea of romantic. Having the waitress hit on my boyfriend during dinner because they clearly know each other for some reason or another. I hate those stooopid cards where they show two little kids kissing or holding hands, but for some reason those I have dated GIVE THEM TO ME. That tells me they dont know me very well. They also give me candy - booooorring!
I'd really like someone to go out of their way on my behalf to be romantic and put some thought into what might just impress me. Surprise me, embarass yourself, make a scene, put yourself out on a limb. I love that. Remember that I love Peter Frampton and have him join us for dinner. ha ha. Ok, ok, if that is too much make dinner reservations in a place we have to get on a plane to get to - and during dinner sit next to me, not across the table from me. Have a plan and lastly dont make me pay for dinner cause your credit card bounced. It really kills any romantic thoughts I may have toward you.
I can assure you I will go out of my way to romance you. That is if I am in love with you. I have killed myself to get tickets to already-sold-out-shows and sporting events for previous chumps I have been in love with. I have cooked difficult, gourmet dinners only to have my dude show up late and too tired to participate. I have wrangled myself into fancy outfits thinking they would be excited and been told they WERE TOO TIRED.
I often hear "you must have tons of guys chasing you down" which I wish more than anything were true. Men in their 60's hit on me, in part I believe because they arent afraid of being rejected anymore. Sometimes there are a couple of interesting ones, but there is very seldom one that I find HOT and SMART and admirable. One that makes me laugh and laugh, one who has razor sharp wit and isnt afraid to use it on me.
Dont be afraid of me, or intimidated I am just smart and full of goals I want to achieve. Grab my hand when we are walking and pull me up against you so I can feel your breath. Lean in close to me, about 90% as "Hitch" would say and smell my hair. Help me slow down as I live my life too fast. Insist on helping me with something even though I will resist due to my rediculous feminist independence.
Above all, give me roses on the 14th of February - not the 16th or 17th. Or a week after.